Sarah had some difficulties with the first pop quiz of her bus tour on the subject of the Midnight Ride of Paul Revere. The intellectual boobery were agog. “See”, they all clamored with gleeful freudenschade, “she really is a dunce”.
Part of the problem is that Sarah just didn’t attend the right schools. Instead of attending Harvard, walking distance from where Paul Revere began his famous ride, she graduated from the University of Idaho. She even studied in Moscow, though, a fact often overlooked by the intelligentsia (Moscow, Idaho, that is).
Instead of attending the prestigious Concord Academy, a posh preparatory school for girls in Concord, Mass., just a short walk from the “rude bridge that arched the flood” where the “shot heard round the world” was fired, and where her roommate might have been Jordan’s Queen Noor, Palin attended Wasilla High in Wasilla, Alaska.
Paul Revere never made it to warn the “embattled farmers” in Concord but, as Sarah Palin rightly asserted, he did warn the British. I proudly quote here from Wikipedia: “Revere was captured and questioned by the British soldiers at gunpoint. He told them of the army's movement from Boston, and that British army troops would be in some danger if they approached Lexington, because of the large number of hostile militia gathered there.”
And there were bells. My authority is, again and unabashedly, Wikipedia: “As the group [British soldiers who had captured Paul Revere] drew closer to Lexington, the town bell began to clang rapidly, to which one of the captives proclaimed to the British soldiers ‘The bell's a'ringing! The town's alarmed, and you're all dead men!’ The British soldiers gathered and decided not to press further towards Lexington, to instead free the prisoners and to head back to warn their commanders.”
Well, I think she gets a C minus instead of an F because bells were involved and Paul Revere did warn the British. I fear she has been taking a somewhat cavalier approach toward her educational bus tour, however, and that for the remainder of this trip, she must do her homework. If she does, she may be able to bring her grade up to a solid B, more than enough to be president of all 57 states.
By the way, smarties, who was the sexton of the Old North Church, Robert Newman, trying to warn? And did he hang out one lantern or two?
